What is up hear?

Jeremy has been acting a little off lately. His mother is moving and he keeps running off to help her. Fine that’s good. But I talked to his uncle and his uncle told me that Jeremy hasn’t been helping lately and saying he had to go visit me. Which as you can guess he hasn’t been doing.

He’s been running off with this other girl a lot. I’m thinking he may have been with her. Well last night on the way to our child birth class someone called his phone. He looked at it and decided not to answer. I took the phone and seen the name. I thought it was one of his aunts by the name. He told me not to answer it because it was another person. The name he had in his phone for that number was only 1 letter off of the name of the girl. When the girl finally hung up he turned the phone off

Latter at dinner I brought this girl up and mentioned how I knew he wanted to date her in the past. He asked me how I knew that and I told him how he told me before. He went oh yeah I remember. About a minute or so latter he looked at me and said that was another girl. I told him to late he already admitted to liking this one. He did the whole oops routine.

Am I just hormonal and freaking out or is my fear that he might be cheating seem legitimate?

Fealing better

Well I’m feeling better. Jeremy and I have worked things out for the most part. I’m still upset that I sit home wile he goes out with our friends and goes and meets up with that girl. I really need a run. I feel weak in more way then one. Being upset really takes a toile on your body at 8 months pregnant, depression not helping my case any. Then I really feel weak with the fact that when I did see Jeremy yesterday all my will power fell away. I hate that about Jeremy one touch and I can help but no longer feel mad at him. Well I was still mad but I lost the ability to push him away. Then he kissed me and I was lost. He is the only man that can do that to me.

So today was his nieces birthday party. I can’t believe she’s two now. Jeremy and I have been together for a long time now.

I have the house to myself tonight. Dad has work and mom and Marie are up at my aunts house till wends. Its goanna be peaceful. Just wish I lived in a better neighborhood. I’ll be fine my dog is protective and Jeremy’s only a phone call away. I figure with tonight’s cool weather I can sleep with my blankets around me the way I like. It’s more comfortable that way. Well I’m going to bed . . . night.

Upset

Well Jeremy’s an inconsiderate jerk yesterday he knew I really wanted to see him. Instead he went off and hung out with some friends. To cheer another girl up! Yesterday was an important day to me and he went to cheer another girl up. I called him and when he said where he was I started crying. I cried my self to sleep last night because of him.

He’s been calling this morning and he came over. I couldn’t answer the door other wise he will never understand how upset he made me. I wanted to open the door and fling my self into his arms so badly. Instead I ended up with my back to the door on the floor crying. I feel sick from all this crying and the fact I had vary little sleep last night. I’m goanna go lay down I feel sick. Wish me luck.

all alown

Jeremy's out enjoying himself. Cheering another girl up. Just my luck sometimes I feal like he dosent care about me. He knew I whanted to see him i'm not stupid. I've been crying seance Found our whare he was. Todays an important day to me and he can't even visit me. No he has toi visit danna.

Pregnant on a hot summer day

Pregnant on a hot summer day

Just my luck! Pregnant in the hottest month of the year! The next one will defiantly be planed. Perhaps start trying for the next one in August. At least that way I won’t be pregnant. To tell the truth I feel kind of guilty for hating my pregnancy. I wanted to me a mother séance I was a child myself. Of course that involved me married with a good career.

Truthfully I should have been prepared. Life for me never goes as pained. Paining at least temporally gives me a séance of control over my own life. One day I will. I’ll be married with a home and career. I will give my child and any more I have the best life possible. Until then I have to play my cards just right.

As for the heat and being pregnant at least I can have the peace of mind that my child is safe, comfortable, and she’s not hungry, as long as she tucked safely inside of me. Good luck to all the moms and moms-to-be out their. And happy national breastfeeding week!



Happy Birthday Kaylee